Tuesday, 23 October 2007

PostHeaderIcon Some people shouldn't be allowed computers

Someone rang me in work today, the conversation went like this:

Idiot: I'm trying to find the Health and Safety pages on the company Intranet but can't see them, can you help me?

Me: Of course, just click the 'Health & Safety' link on the left-hand navigation bar on the Intranet home page.

Idiot: I can't see the Health & Safety link all I can see is the Business Post home page.

Me: That's not the Intranet, that's the Business Post web site. Go to the Intranet and you'll see the link.

Idiot: How do I find the Intranet?

Me: Do you have an icon for it on your desktop?

Idiot: I have a big blue e is that the one?

Me: Yes it should be.

Idiot: That opens the Business Post website.

Me: Right, then your default home page has been changed. Type http colon slash slash server zero one slash intranet in your browsers address bar.

Idiot: What's a colon?

Me: It's the two dots on top of each other.

Idiot: Oh yes, are those forward slashes are back slashes?

Me: Forward slashes of course.

Idiot: What's next?

Me: server zero one slash intranet.

Idiot: is that a forward slash or back slash.

Me: forward slash.

Idiot: What's after the slash?

Me: intranet

Idiot: It says the page cannot be displayed.

Me: Are you sure you typed it correctly?

Idiot: Yes.

Me: Can you read out to me what you typed?

Idiot: http colon forward slash forward slash server o one forward slash intranet.

Me: Is that an o one or zero one?

Idiot: zero one.

Me: Are you sure it's all spelt correctly?

Idiot: Yes.

Me: Are you sure you used forward slashes instead of back slashes?

Idiot: Yes.

Me: Did you use the slash key on the left hand side or right hand side of the keyboard?

Idiot: The left hand one.

Me: That's a back slash not a forward slash, retype it using the other slash key.

Idiot: Oh, I thought those were forward slashes... What comes after the http?

Me: colon forward-slash forward-slash, that's the right-hand one, server zero one forward-slash intranet.

Idiot: What comes after the last slash?

Me: intranet

Idiot: It still says page cannot be displayed.

Me: Well something isn't typed correctly then.

Idiot: Oh, I'll just keep typing it in until it displays the page.

Me: Well that won't work if you're obviously not typing it correctly. Read out to me character by character exactly what you've typed.

Idiot: h t t p colon slash slash s e r v e r o one slash i n t e r n e t

Me: It's not 'internet' it's intranet i n t r a n e t.

Idiot: Oh it's working now.

Me: I am glad. [as I slam down the phone]

Jan commentated on another post that I'm more patient than I used to be, I think he might be right. I was losing it a bit towards the end and it was coming over in the tone of my voice but I didn't swear at her once! There was a time when I would have cut that converstion off about half way through and just emailed her a link.

Friday, 19 October 2007

PostHeaderIcon The Triumph of Death

We have hanging on the wall in our lounge a copy of The Triumph of Death by Pieter Bruegel the Elder painted in 1562. The painting is a panoramic landscape of death: the sky in the distance is blackened by smoke from burning cities and the sea is littered with shipwrecks. Armies of skeletons advance on the hapless living, who either flee in terror or try vainly to fight back. Skeletons kill people in a variety of ways - slitting throats, hanging, drowning, and even hunting with skeletal dogs. In the foreground, skeletons haul a wagon full of skulls, and ring the bell that signifies the death knell of the world. A fool plays the lute while a skeleton behind him plays along; a starving dog nibbles at the face of a child; a cross sits lonely and impotent in the center of the painting. People flee into a tunnel decorated with crosses whilst a skeleton on horseback slaughters people with a scythe. The painting clearly depicts people of different social backgrounds - from peasants and soldiers to nobles and even a king - being taken by death indiscriminately. (description copied from Wikipedia [click here].)

So why on earth do we have it hanging on our living room wall? I bought the picture almost 20 years ago whilst visiting the Museo del Prado, Madrid where the original hangs. I was completely captivated by the picture which really is something to behold and so bought a copy in the museum shop. I was a youngster in them days still living at home with my mother and I hung the picture on my bedroom wall in a very nice frame made by Mike. The picture stayed there for years before I left home and Em & I moved into our current house. The house was quite bare when we moved in and so we just stuck the picture on a convenient hook that was already in the wall with the full intention of changing it for something more appropriate as soon as. Over 12 years later it still hangs there!

It's funny and a bit embarrassing seeing peoples reaction when they see it there for the first time, they must think we are weirdos or something! Well anyway, I think it's a great picture and it matches our colour scheme perfectly!
Thursday, 11 October 2007

PostHeaderIcon Photos: Paragliding, October 2007

Jan took me paragliding today, he was doing his tandem training and needed some cargo so I volunteered. I had this idea that it would be a great adventure filled day but Jan failed to warn me of the reality. We spent all day sat on the side of a cold, windy, wet hill first waiting for the dense fog to clear and then waiting for the high winds to drop. We did eventually get a flight in at about 4PM but Jan aggravated a knee injury and so we couldn't do any more after that. Anyway, it was well worth the long wait - it was ace!

Here's some pictures I took, not of Jan and I but of the others on the hillside. I've also added some photo's I took of Jan paragliding off Pen-Y-Fan some time ago.


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